Diet results

Uncle Tibbs had been working beary hard on his diet.  It was time for a weigh-in.

"Alright, here I go," he said.  "Surely I must have lost some weight after all of this."

He stepped onto the scale.  The number did not budge.

"What!  How can this be?"  He kicked the scale.  The number still did not budge.  He let out a sigh.  "I guess I will always be... big."

"Uncle Tibbs, may I please say something?" I asked.

"Go ahead, Ajdin."

"I have been trying to tell you this entire time.  I like your big belly."

"You do?"

"Yes.  It's perfect for mountain climbing..."

"...it can be played like a drum..."

GONG!!

"...it is my favorite pillow..."

"...but most of all, I like you just the way you are."

"SO DO WE!"

"Aw, thanks guys," Uncle Tibbs said.  "Now, who's up for some salmon and honey biscuits?  I'm hungry!"

Diet

Earlier this week, I saw Uncle Tibbs looking at himself in the mirror.  He was talking to himself.

"You've really let yourself go this time, Tibbs.  You've got to do something about that huge belly of yours.  This is no good."

"Uncle Tibbs, what are you doing?" I asked.  "Is everything okay?"

"Everything is not okay, Ajdin," he replied.  He pointed to his large belly.  "I've taken it a bit too easy during this winter.  HiBEARnation is over and spring is well on its way.  I'm going to go on a diet."

"A diet?" I said in disbelief.  "As in D-I-E-T?"

"Yes, I need to lose weight."

"But Uncle Tibbs -- "

"No buts... I am on a diet," he said.

He ate very little.

"I'll just have a light dinner tonight, Ajdin," he said.  "You go ahead and have all the salmon and honey biscuits."

"But Uncle Tibbs -- "

"No buts... I am on a diet," he said.

I even saw Uncle Tibbs practicing yoga.

"Yogi bears are all thin.  Perhaps yoga will help me lose some weight," he said while lying upside down.

"But Uncle Tibbs -- "

"No buts... I am on a diet," he said.

Uncle Tibbs was also working very hard lifting weights.

"Muscle burns more.... ERGHHH... calories than fat does... UNGHHH... so maybe this will help me.... PHEW.... lose weight."

"But Uncle Tibbs -- "

"No buts.... URNGHHERRRGH... I am on a diet," he said.

Uncle Tibbs was taking this diet thing beary seriously.  I wonder if he was going to lose any weight?  He seemed to be a bit hard on himself.